Women of Faith contest

This blog entry answers the following question:"If you could become a Women of Faith speaker, what would you talk about?"

I would speak about struggling with God's will versus my own.  I had big plans for my life.  I wanted to be a wife and mother since I was a young girl.  I dated many people but no one I really clicked with. I went through times of being despondent and depressed.  I drove my friends and family crazy at times whining about my single condition.  It got really bad when everyone I "hung out" with got married.  I really felt like a third wheel then.  My good friends assured me that I wasn't a burden, but that did little for my attitude.  I would often babysit so others could have date nights.  At least someone benefiting from my single condition, right?  I passed my twenties and was well into my thirties before I realized my big mistake.  My greatest relationship should have been with my Father in heaven.  I had been searching elsewhere for a fulfilling relationship when all I had to do was turn to God.  I began a relationship with Him and my life changed forever.  I began to become comfortable with myself and the fact that it might not be in His will for me to have a mate.  I knew God had a plan for me, but I was not willing to submit to it until this time.  After a couple of years of letting God show me His plan, He whammied me with a man that got my attention in a big way. 
Now yes, I did go to bible college and I did work in the church, but never did I picture myself as a preacher's wife.  I felt unworthy of such a "lofty" title.  Well....preacher's wives are just sinner's and regular people like everyone else.  We have faults (can you imagine??) and warts just like all of the people around us.  I still go through times of doubt when I don't think I'm doing a good job, but God has given me people to encourage me and help me out.  Most of them are preacher's wives too.  I am in awe of them and they are regular people like me.  WOW!  
I keep searching out God's will for me daily.  He has given me my dreams, a wonderful, romantic husband and 2 ornery, fantastic boys that I chase around all the time.  My family is in love with each other and with God.  Did I mention that I didn't find the "perfect for me" man until I was 34 years old?  I had babies at 37 and 39.  I started late but I don't regret a minute of it.  My earlier life prepared me for this life.  It was God's perfect timing not my "I want it now!" will.
The verse that I hold dear is Isaiah 40:31 "but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." (NIV) There is a song that uses this verse and it ends "help us Lord, help us Lord to wait."  And that's the crux of the matter.  We have to wait on His will instead of the "fast food" mentality of wanting everything NOW.  If I hadn't waited on God, I don't believe I would be in a happy relationship.  I can't be sure of that, but I can't imagine a better mate than the one He chose for me.  If this helps any of my friends that are searching, it is well worth my while to write down.